By Professor Bobby Hernandez
By Professor Bobby Hernandez
Owner & Instructor at Hernandez Martial Arts
Developing life skills for children is about much more than preparing them for school, sports, or their next big milestone.
As parents, we spend a lot of time thinking about the life skills our children will need and preparing them for what’s next.
We prepare them for their first day of school, the next grade, the big test, the soccer game, the recital, high school, and eventually, college or a career.
There’s always something next, but after spending more than four decades working with children and watching many of them grow into adults, I’ve come to believe childhood is preparing them for something much bigger.
Life.
Eventually, the grades won’t matter as much, the trophies will sit on a shelf, the childhood activities will end, and nobody will remember who was the fastest eight-year-old, who got the highest score, or who learned something first.
But the person they became along the way?
That matters.
The Lessons Hidden Inside Childhood
So much of childhood looks ordinary while it’s happening. A child struggles with homework, they don’t make the team, a friend hurts their feelings, they’re nervous about trying something new, they lose, they fail, and they get frustrated because something isn’t coming as quickly as they’d like.
In the moment, these can seem like little childhood problems but, they’re practicing for something much bigger.
They’re learning what to do when life doesn’t go their way.
They’re learning how to handle disappointment, frustration, fear, and uncertainty. They’re learning whether to give up when something becomes challenging or take a breath, regroup, and try again.
Those aren’t just childhood lessons, those are life skills for children that they’ll carry with them long after childhood ends.
One Day, We Won’t Be There to Solve It
This may be one of the hardest parts of being a parent. When our children are young, we’re there for almost everything.
We answer the questions. We help solve the problems. We comfort them when they’re hurt, encourage them when they’re scared, and help them get back up when they fall, but that’s not always going to be the case.
One day, they’ll face a difficult decision and we won’t be standing beside them.
They’ll have to speak up for themselves, they’ll have to deal with someone who treats them unfairly, they’ll have to recover from a failure, they’ll have to walk into a room where they don’t know anyone, and they’ll have to make a decision when they’re not sure what the right answer is.
In those moments, they won’t be able to borrow our confidence… They’ll have to rely on their own.
The Life Skills Children Learn in the Little Things
That’s why I’ve come to look at childhood differently. Learning to introduce yourself to someone new isn’t a little thing. Learning to control your emotions when you’re frustrated isn’t a little thing. Learning to keep a promise, take responsibility for a mistake, show respect when you’re upset, or finish something you wanted to quit isn’t a little thing.
Those moments are building something.
Confidence.
Discipline.
Emotional control.
Perseverance.
Responsibility.
Character.
We may not see the payoff immediately, but little by little, children are becoming the people they’ll someday need to be.
That’s What I’ve Always Loved About Martial Arts
I’ve never believed martial arts was simply about learning how to kick, punch, block, or earn belts.
Those things are part of it, of course, but they’re not the reason I’ve spent my life teaching children.
The real value is what happens while they’re learning those things…
A child struggles with a technique and keeps practicing.
They stand in front of the class even though they’re nervous.
They learn to control their frustration instead of letting their frustration control them.
They discover that improvement takes patience.
They learn that earning something feels different than simply being given it.
And slowly, almost without realizing it, they’re preparing for life.
That’s what we’ve tried to do at Hernandez Martial Arts since 1982. The karate is important, but the person we’re helping develop through the karate is even more important.
Childhood Doesn’t Last Forever
Sometimes it’s hard to remember that when you’re living in the middle of it, there are lunches to pack, homework to finish, practices to get to, clothes on the floor, arguments between siblings, and a million other things competing for our attention.
Then somehow, incredibly fast, they’re grown, and our role changes.
We can’t make every decision for them.
We can’t remove every obstacle.
We can’t protect them from every disappointment.
What we can do is use the years we have to help prepare them.
To give them opportunities to struggle a little, succeed a little, fail a little, get back up, try again, and discover who they are.
Childhood isn’t really about preparing children for the next test, the next game, the next belt, or even the next stage of school.
It’s preparing them for the day when they have to stand on their own.
If along the way we’ve helped them become confident enough to believe in themselves, strong enough to handle adversity, disciplined enough to make good choices, and kind enough to treat people well…
I’d say we prepared them for something far more important than any test they could ever take.
We prepared them for life.
At Hernandez Martial Arts, our kids martial arts program is designed to help children develop the confidence, character, and life skills they’ll carry with them far beyond the dojo and into their adult life.
About the Author
Professor Bobby Hernandez is an owner and instructor at Hernandez Martial Arts, a family-owned martial arts school serving Union City, Fremont, Hayward, and Newark families since 1982.
For more than four decades, Hernandez Martial Arts has helped children develop confidence, focus, discipline, emotional control, perseverance, and life skills through martial arts training.
As a father, instructor, and school owner, Professor Bobby has spent his life helping children develop the character and confidence they need to succeed both on and off the mat.